Smile At Your Own Risk

My first ‘feelings’ post. I promised myself I would never write one of these, but It’s important to keep it real, ladies and gents.

Tomorrow is my 28th birthday. Little M was born right after I turned 27, so my year was spent being a new mom. It was full of highs – her laughter, dancing, first wave & vacation – but looking back I mostly think about the lows – the loneliness, anxiety, guilt & disappointment – and that really made me think.

People are always telling me how happy I am. That they have never seen me without a smile. For the most part, their right. I usually appear happy – full of smiles at work, on social media, and at social gatherings. Someone said this to me just today, and that, coupled with my birthday, inspired me to write this.

If all I can remember are the low points, than how do these people think I am so happy?

A family member once told me this in response to my struggle with disappointing friendships: ‘You need to stop being so seemingly perfect. Let people see who you really are, and then they will be able to be there for you. If they think you’re doing great, they won’t think you need them.’

Those people who see me every day at work and think I am the happiest person in the world, a year ago I would be thankful to hear you think my life is perfect. I wanted to put off that facade. Now, I wish I could invite you back in time, a month into being a new mom and only one friend came to visit and brought me dinner. The days I spent checking my phone to yet again have no one check on me and my new baby. The wishing I was vulnerable. The tears I still have when I leave baby classes and I still haven’t made a mom friend.

I am so done with that facade. I want people to see the real me, because I think I’m becoming a pretty cool chick, and I am proud of that.

So here is my chance. I usually don’t ‘do’ birthdays. But what better time than to declare your ‘goals’ and wishes for your year ahead. So here goes nothing…my letter to 28.

Dear 28,

I promise to be as real as real can get. I will be open, vulnerable, and plain ole’ Lizzy. I won’t care about what people think and I will just live my true life. Please let me see the good in each day. To remember how lucky I am to have  the family I have. Forgive the people  who haven’t been there for me when they were supposed to. Heal our  friendships and make them stronger than before. Help me be more compassionate and patient. Make me strong enough to ask for help. Create a wife, mom, work, friend, daughter balance that makes me and everyone else happy. Keep my family healthy and safe. Help me grow in every way. I can’t wait to look back at 28 like BOOM, I did it! I became the person I knew I could be.

And please, please, please, bring me a nice mom friend, or two, who I can have wine nights with and (nicely) gossip about life.

Xx, Lizzy

 

 

I started this blog to share my feelings on motherhood, and I hope at least one mom out there let’s go of who she thinks she should be, embrace what she wants to be, and goes after it!

82 comments

  1. I truly wanted to type a word in order to express gratitude to you for these awesome recommendations you are placing here. My extensive internet look up has finally been compensated with really good details to share with my partners. I ‘d express that we readers actually are definitely blessed to live in a fabulous website with many perfect professionals with insightful ideas. I feel quite fortunate to have come across your web site and look forward to tons of more amazing moments reading here. Thanks again for everything.

  2. I enjoy you because of your whole effort on this blog. Kate take interest in getting into research and it is obvious why. Most people learn all relating to the lively manner you offer simple steps by means of the web blog and as well recommend contribution from others on the point so our princess is now studying a great deal. Take pleasure in the remaining portion of the new year. You are conducting a terrific job.

  3. I simply wanted to thank you so much again. I am not sure the things that I would’ve worked on in the absence of the hints provided by you about this question. It absolutely was the daunting concern for me personally, however , being able to see the very skilled tactic you treated that forced me to weep over joy. I’m just happy for the support and even hope that you are aware of a powerful job that you are doing teaching many people using your blog post. I am certain you have never come across any of us.

  4. I have to express my appreciation to the writer for bailing me out of this type of trouble. After researching through the world-wide-web and getting principles which were not pleasant, I believed my life was done. Being alive devoid of the answers to the difficulties you’ve sorted out as a result of your good guide is a serious case, as well as ones that might have adversely damaged my career if I hadn’t noticed your web page. Your main capability and kindness in handling every part was helpful. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I had not encountered such a thing like this. I can at this time look forward to my future. Thanks a lot so much for the skilled and amazing guide. I will not think twice to refer your web site to any individual who needs and wants guidelines about this matter.

  5. I am commenting to make you understand what a fabulous encounter my daughter encountered reading your blog. She figured out lots of issues, which include what it is like to possess a wonderful teaching style to get many others very easily gain knowledge of selected tricky subject areas. You undoubtedly did more than people’s desires. Thank you for rendering the effective, trustworthy, edifying as well as fun thoughts on the topic to Sandra.

  6. I not to mention my guys ended up looking at the good solutions found on the blog and then then came up with an awful feeling I had not expressed respect to the web blog owner for those techniques. These boys had been for this reason thrilled to study them and have surely been enjoying these things. We appreciate you being quite thoughtful and for using such quality issues most people are really desirous to know about. Our sincere apologies for not expressing gratitude to you sooner.

  7. I actually wanted to develop a word so as to say thanks to you for all of the nice information you are placing at this site. My rather long internet search has now been honored with reliable knowledge to share with my company. I would point out that many of us visitors are very lucky to dwell in a really good place with very many perfect people with insightful opinions. I feel somewhat grateful to have seen the website page and look forward to plenty of more amazing times reading here. Thank you once again for a lot of things.

  8. Thank you so much for providing individuals with an exceptionally special possiblity to read critical reviews from this site. It can be very terrific and also stuffed with amusement for me personally and my office fellow workers to search your blog at the least three times in one week to read through the latest items you have got. And of course, we are certainly impressed considering the great guidelines you give. Some two tips in this article are essentially the finest we’ve ever had.

  9. I have to show my thanks to this writer for bailing me out of such a trouble. Because of researching through the the net and getting ideas which are not helpful, I thought my life was well over. Being alive devoid of the answers to the issues you have solved by way of your good posting is a serious case, and ones that might have negatively damaged my career if I had not noticed the blog. Your own know-how and kindness in handling all areas was excellent. I am not sure what I would’ve done if I hadn’t discovered such a solution like this. It’s possible to at this point relish my future. Thanks a lot so much for your professional and effective guide. I will not hesitate to recommend the blog to any individual who should receive direction about this matter.

  10. My wife and i were really more than happy when Raymond managed to complete his homework out of the ideas he had using your web site. It is now and again perplexing to just always be handing out steps which often most people have been selling. And we also see we have got the writer to appreciate for that. Most of the illustrations you have made, the easy web site navigation, the friendships you will aid to instill – it is mostly astonishing, and it is facilitating our son and our family believe that that matter is satisfying, and that is particularly indispensable. Thank you for the whole lot!

  11. Thanks so much for providing individuals with an exceptionally memorable opportunity to read in detail from this site. It’s always so brilliant and also jam-packed with a good time for me and my office fellow workers to visit your blog at the least three times in 7 days to find out the new things you have. And of course, I’m just at all times contented considering the sensational guidelines you give. Certain two tips in this posting are essentially the simplest I have had.

  12. I needed to create you the bit of word to thank you very much over again over the stunning solutions you’ve shown on this site. It has been extremely open-handed with you to supply unreservedly exactly what some people could have offered for sale as an electronic book to help make some dough for their own end, and in particular considering that you could possibly have done it in case you considered necessary. These concepts as well acted like the great way to understand that other people online have the same keenness really like my very own to understand way more pertaining to this condition. I’m certain there are several more pleasant moments ahead for people who read your blog.

  13. I needed to draft you that bit of note so as to say thanks a lot yet again over the extraordinary methods you’ve shown in this article. This is certainly seriously generous with you giving publicly exactly what many individuals would have made available as an ebook to end up making some money on their own, principally seeing that you might well have done it if you desired. The suggestions as well served to provide a great way to recognize that someone else have the same zeal really like mine to find out a whole lot more with regard to this condition. I think there are lots of more enjoyable instances ahead for individuals that looked over your blog.

  14. I truly wanted to jot down a simple word in order to say thanks to you for all of the fantastic techniques you are sharing at this website. My considerable internet investigation has now been rewarded with reasonable strategies to go over with my guests. I ‘d believe that we visitors actually are undeniably blessed to live in a really good site with very many wonderful individuals with interesting opinions. I feel truly happy to have encountered your entire website page and look forward to tons of more thrilling minutes reading here. Thank you again for everything.

  15. A lot of thanks for all of your effort on this website. My aunt delights in engaging in investigation and it is simple to grasp why. I know all concerning the dynamic mode you produce simple solutions by means of this blog and encourage participation from people about this matter so our girl is always learning so much. Take pleasure in the remaining portion of the year. Your conducting a remarkable job.

  16. I wanted to post you this little word just to give thanks once again with your lovely methods you’ve contributed on this site. This is certainly tremendously open-handed of you to present unhampered what many individuals might have offered for sale as an electronic book to help with making some dough for themselves, certainly given that you could possibly have done it if you wanted. The inspiring ideas additionally worked as a good way to be certain that many people have a similar interest much like mine to grasp great deal more with regard to this matter. I believe there are numerous more pleasurable moments ahead for those who read carefully your blog.

  17. I would like to voice my appreciation for your kind-heartedness giving support to those individuals that require help with this particular content. Your special commitment to getting the message all-around was rather useful and has really empowered others like me to get to their targets. Your own warm and friendly report means this much a person like me and somewhat more to my colleagues. Regards; from everyone of us.

  18. A lot of thanks for all your effort on this web site. Ellie take interest in conducting research and it’s really obvious why. My partner and i notice all of the dynamic method you produce useful information on the blog and in addition encourage response from people on the content so our own daughter is undoubtedly learning a lot. Enjoy the remaining portion of the new year. Your conducting a really good job.

  19. Thanks for all your valuable labor on this web site. My mom loves carrying out internet research and it’s obvious why. Most people learn all about the compelling method you provide great information via this web site and boost participation from other ones about this subject matter plus my child is always being taught a lot of things. Take advantage of the remaining portion of the new year. You’re the one doing a really great job.

  20. I simply wanted to write down a quick remark to say thanks to you for those superb points you are placing on this site. My extensive internet research has at the end been rewarded with extremely good know-how to write about with my visitors. I would assert that many of us website visitors are quite lucky to be in a notable network with so many wonderful professionals with good pointers. I feel quite privileged to have encountered the weblog and look forward to really more pleasurable times reading here. Thanks once more for everything.

  21. I really wanted to type a comment to be able to thank you for all of the remarkable tips you are giving at this site. My particularly long internet search has finally been paid with professional content to write about with my friends and family. I ‘d state that that most of us website visitors actually are definitely lucky to be in a really good site with so many awesome people with helpful solutions. I feel pretty happy to have come across your web site and look forward to tons of more thrilling moments reading here. Thank you once again for everything.

  22. I actually wanted to post a small message to say thanks to you for some of the splendid hints you are giving out at this site. My incredibly long internet look up has at the end of the day been honored with awesome ideas to go over with my close friends. I would say that many of us site visitors actually are unquestionably lucky to live in a fine network with very many outstanding people with good opinions. I feel quite privileged to have seen your entire site and look forward to some more cool moments reading here. Thanks a lot again for everything.

  23. My spouse and i felt very delighted that Louis could deal with his investigation from your precious recommendations he obtained when using the web page. It’s not at all simplistic to simply always be giving freely guides that many some other people have been trying to sell. And we also fully grasp we have the website owner to give thanks to because of that. All of the illustrations you have made, the simple site menu, the friendships you make it easier to create – it’s many unbelievable, and it is leading our son and us consider that the situation is excellent, and that is especially mandatory. Thank you for the whole lot!

  24. Thank you so much for providing individuals with an exceptionally remarkable chance to discover important secrets from this web site. It really is very excellent and also full of a lot of fun for me and my office colleagues to search your web site on the least thrice per week to study the newest secrets you have. And lastly, we are always happy with all the awesome tips you give. Selected 4 facts on this page are particularly the most beneficial I have had.

  25. Thanks for all of the efforts on this web page. My mom loves participating in research and it’s really easy to see why. We learn all regarding the lively ways you give vital techniques by means of this blog and even cause participation from other ones on that concept plus our simple princess is actually discovering a lot. Take advantage of the rest of the year. You are always doing a tremendous job.

  26. I am just commenting to let you understand of the notable experience my cousin’s daughter gained viewing your site. She picked up a wide variety of things, which include how it is like to possess an ideal coaching heart to let folks really easily fully grasp specified extremely tough topics. You really exceeded our expectations. Many thanks for giving such beneficial, dependable, informative and in addition cool tips about this topic to Tanya.

  27. After study a number of of the weblog posts on your website now, and I truly like your way of blogging. I bookmarked it to my bookmark website record and might be checking back soon. Pls try my website online as effectively and let me know what you think.

  28. I wanted to draft you one tiny observation to finally thank you again on the wonderful suggestions you have shown in this case. It is so seriously open-handed of people like you to grant extensively precisely what most people would have offered for sale as an electronic book in making some money for their own end, precisely now that you might have tried it in the event you considered necessary. The smart ideas additionally served as a easy way to realize that other people have similar keenness much like my very own to find out more with respect to this condition. Certainly there are a lot more pleasurable instances ahead for individuals who scan through your blog.

  29. Thanks so much for providing individuals with remarkably splendid opportunity to read articles and blog posts from this website. It’s usually very lovely and also jam-packed with a good time for me and my office colleagues to visit the blog really 3 times a week to find out the latest items you will have. And lastly, I’m usually fascinated with the remarkable things you serve. Selected 2 points in this post are easily the very best I’ve ever had.

  30. My husband and i felt absolutely relieved Michael could deal with his web research through the entire precious recommendations he made from your very own site. It’s not at all simplistic just to find yourself handing out tactics that many others could have been selling. And we acknowledge we now have the website owner to appreciate because of that. The entire illustrations you made, the simple site navigation, the friendships you give support to promote – it’s got most exceptional, and it’s facilitating our son and our family know that that subject matter is brilliant, which is exceedingly indispensable. Many thanks for the whole lot!

  31. A lot of thanks for all your valuable effort on this web page. My niece delights in conducting internet research and it’s really simple to grasp why. A number of us hear all relating to the dynamic ways you present good solutions through this blog and in addition recommend contribution from the others on the idea then my simple princess is undoubtedly being taught a lot. Take advantage of the rest of the year. You are always carrying out a powerful job.

  32. Thank you a lot for giving everyone an extremely splendid possiblity to read articles and blog posts from this web site. It really is so awesome and full of a good time for me and my office peers to visit your site at a minimum three times per week to find out the latest guidance you have got. Not to mention, I am also at all times happy with your unique things you serve. Selected 4 facts on this page are in fact the most impressive we’ve had.

  33. Thanks for your whole effort on this blog. Gloria loves conducting investigations and it’s really easy to understand why. My partner and i hear all of the lively means you give very important guidance on your blog and therefore increase contribution from people on the content so my princess is actually starting to learn so much. Enjoy the rest of the new year. Your doing a terrific job.

  34. Thank you so much for providing individuals with an exceptionally marvellous opportunity to read articles and blog posts from this website. It is always very enjoyable and as well , packed with a good time for me personally and my office fellow workers to visit your site a minimum of 3 times in a week to read through the fresh tips you will have. And indeed, I’m certainly motivated with your magnificent suggestions you serve. Some two facts on this page are truly the finest I’ve ever had.

  35. I enjoy you because of every one of your labor on this web site. My mom loves making time for research and it’s really easy to see why. Many of us hear all of the compelling form you convey sensible tips and tricks by means of the web site and as well as welcome participation from others on this concern then our daughter has always been understanding a great deal. Have fun with the remaining portion of the new year. You’re performing a great job.

  36. I needed to put you that tiny word to finally say thank you as before for those fantastic solutions you have shown on this site. It’s so unbelievably generous with people like you in giving unhampered all numerous people would’ve offered for an e book in order to make some dough on their own, even more so given that you might well have done it if you decided. These secrets in addition served to provide a great way to understand that someone else have a similar zeal similar to my personal own to understand much more regarding this issue. Certainly there are numerous more pleasurable times ahead for many who browse through your blog.

  37. I simply had to thank you very much all over again. I do not know what I might have sorted out without these suggestions shown by you concerning such a area. This was a real traumatic issue for me personally, however , taking a look at a new expert manner you processed that made me to cry for gladness. I am just happy for the information and even sincerely hope you know what a powerful job you happen to be accomplishing training the mediocre ones all through your webpage. More than likely you’ve never met all of us.

  38. Nice post. I be taught something tougher on different blogs everyday. It’ll all the time be stimulating to learn content material from different writers and apply somewhat something from their store. I抎 choose to make use of some with the content material on my weblog whether you don抰 mind. Natually I抣l give you a hyperlink in your internet blog. Thanks for sharing.

  39. I would like to show my appreciation for your generosity supporting those individuals that need help on this important concern. Your very own dedication to passing the solution all around became exceedingly productive and have continuously empowered most people just like me to reach their ambitions. Your new valuable recommendations can mean this much a person like me and far more to my fellow workers. Regards; from all of us.

  40. I not to mention my pals came looking at the excellent points from your website and then the sudden got a terrible suspicion I never expressed respect to the web blog owner for those tips. The guys had been for that reason excited to see them and have now pretty much been using those things. Appreciation for indeed being indeed accommodating as well as for making a decision on this kind of fine guides millions of individuals are really eager to learn about. My personal sincere regret for not saying thanks to you sooner.

  41. My husband and i have been very delighted when Peter managed to deal with his investigations because of the precious recommendations he received using your web pages. It is now and again perplexing to just find yourself handing out key points which some people could have been selling. Therefore we recognize we’ve got the blog owner to give thanks to because of that. The explanations you made, the simple web site navigation, the relationships you will assist to instill – it’s mostly astonishing, and it’s helping our son in addition to our family reason why that theme is amusing, and that is pretty fundamental. Many thanks for all!

  42. I am also writing to make you know what a great experience our princess gained studying your web site. She discovered numerous pieces, most notably what it is like to have a wonderful coaching character to let a number of people without problems fully grasp various problematic issues. You truly exceeded visitors’ expectations. I appreciate you for imparting the good, dependable, explanatory and in addition easy tips on this topic to Tanya.

  43. I wanted to post a quick comment in order to appreciate you for these pleasant ways you are placing on this site. My prolonged internet look up has at the end of the day been honored with sensible concept to talk about with my great friends. I ‘d repeat that we site visitors actually are truly fortunate to exist in a magnificent site with very many lovely people with very helpful guidelines. I feel extremely lucky to have encountered the web site and look forward to plenty of more entertaining times reading here. Thanks again for a lot of things.

  44. Thanks so much for giving everyone remarkably splendid chance to read articles and blog posts from here. It is often very good and as well , stuffed with a lot of fun for me and my office mates to search your web site no less than thrice weekly to study the latest guidance you have. And indeed, I’m just certainly contented with your striking concepts you serve. Certain 2 points in this article are basically the most beneficial we’ve had.

  45. I intended to create you the tiny note so as to give many thanks once again for these breathtaking secrets you have shared on this site. It was quite unbelievably open-handed with you to give unreservedly what many people could possibly have sold as an ebook in order to make some cash for their own end, specifically since you might well have done it if you considered necessary. Those ideas additionally worked like the easy way to be aware that most people have similar desire the same as mine to grasp great deal more when it comes to this condition. I’m certain there are lots of more pleasurable moments in the future for those who view your site.

  46. I enjoy you because of every one of your labor on this web page. My niece take interest in working on research and it’s really easy to understand why. My partner and i hear all regarding the powerful means you create advantageous tips and tricks via the web site and as well as boost response from others about this point then our own child is without a doubt studying so much. Take advantage of the remaining portion of the year. You are carrying out a wonderful job.

  47. I just wanted to write down a quick word to say thanks to you for these unique facts you are giving at this site. My rather long internet look up has at the end of the day been paid with brilliant know-how to share with my companions. I ‘d declare that most of us website visitors are unquestionably lucky to exist in a wonderful place with so many special people with helpful solutions. I feel pretty privileged to have encountered your entire website and look forward to many more exciting moments reading here. Thanks once again for everything.

  48. Thanks for all of the effort on this web page. Kate really likes managing internet research and it’s obvious why. We hear all concerning the compelling tactic you convey practical steps via the website and in addition encourage contribution from website visitors on the subject while our favorite child has been becoming educated so much. Take advantage of the remaining portion of the year. You’re the one conducting a really good job.

  49. I really wanted to jot down a brief word to say thanks to you for these stunning tips and tricks you are placing at this site. My time consuming internet look up has now been recognized with really good facts and strategies to go over with my classmates and friends. I would declare that most of us website visitors actually are truly endowed to be in a decent site with many awesome professionals with helpful tips and hints. I feel very much privileged to have used your entire website page and look forward to some more fabulous times reading here. Thanks again for a lot of things.

  50. Thank you for all your hard work on this web page. Kate enjoys setting aside time for investigations and it’s really easy to see why. Most people learn all about the lively form you provide invaluable techniques by means of your web site and as well strongly encourage participation from visitors on that theme plus our favorite child is without question starting to learn a lot. Take pleasure in the remaining portion of the year. You are carrying out a really great job.

  51. Thanks for your entire hard work on this website. My mother enjoys managing research and it’s really easy to see why. Almost all learn all relating to the lively method you provide good things via your web site and as well as boost response from other ones on that concern while my daughter is actually understanding so much. Take advantage of the rest of the year. You are always conducting a brilliant job.

  52. I wanted to draft you this very little word to help thank you very much yet again about the amazing tips you have featured above. This is really wonderfully generous of you to allow extensively all that a number of people could possibly have marketed as an electronic book to help with making some profit on their own, especially considering the fact that you might well have tried it in the event you desired. The guidelines in addition worked to become easy way to comprehend other people have the identical passion just as my personal own to know whole lot more when it comes to this matter. I believe there are a lot more enjoyable situations ahead for those who browse through your blog post.

  53. I want to get across my love for your kindness giving support to individuals that really want assistance with your niche. Your special commitment to passing the message all through had become really powerful and has in every case empowered regular people much like me to reach their pursuits. Your entire helpful key points implies a great deal to me and a whole lot more to my colleagues. Best wishes; from everyone of us.

  54. Thank you for all of your labor on this site. My mum really loves conducting investigations and it’s really simple to grasp why. My spouse and i learn all concerning the lively manner you give informative information by means of your web blog and improve response from website visitors on that issue while our own girl is now discovering a great deal. Have fun with the rest of the new year. You are performing a fabulous job.

  55. Thank you a lot for giving everyone remarkably terrific opportunity to check tips from this website. It is always very fantastic and as well , full of amusement for me personally and my office fellow workers to search your website a minimum of thrice weekly to see the latest tips you have. And lastly, I am also always satisfied with all the mind-boggling secrets you serve. Certain 3 areas in this article are without a doubt the most suitable we have all had.

  56. I must show some thanks to you for rescuing me from this type of scenario. Just after looking through the online world and obtaining views that were not beneficial, I believed my entire life was gone. Existing minus the approaches to the issues you’ve sorted out all through your entire site is a critical case, as well as those that would have negatively damaged my career if I had not discovered your web blog. Your ability and kindness in taking care of all the details was important. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I had not encountered such a step like this. I can at this moment look ahead to my future. Thanks very much for your high quality and result oriented help. I won’t think twice to refer your site to any individual who needs guidelines on this situation.

  57. My spouse and i were really lucky when Jordan could conclude his investigations through your ideas he was given from your very own weblog. It is now and again perplexing to simply always be releasing strategies which often men and women could have been making money from. And we all see we have you to thank for that. These illustrations you made, the straightforward site navigation, the relationships you can make it possible to engender – it’s got most powerful, and it is assisting our son and the family imagine that that topic is thrilling, and that is exceptionally important. Thanks for the whole lot!

  58. My wife and i felt so excited Peter managed to carry out his studies using the ideas he gained out of your site. It’s not at all simplistic just to happen to be handing out guides which usually people could have been trying to sell. And we understand we need the blog owner to be grateful to because of that. The type of explanations you made, the simple web site menu, the friendships you will help foster – it’s all excellent, and it is assisting our son in addition to the family understand the subject is entertaining, which is certainly highly indispensable. Thanks for the whole lot!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *